I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Fuck you software companies. Stop trying to sneak shit on to my computer.
Fuck you, Apple.
I’m sure you’ve all experienced this. Some of you might’ve fallen for it.
How is this ok?
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I want to make an ad that says, “This isn’t an ad, I just wanted my face on the side of this bus.” with me giving two thumbs up and a cheesy grin.
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If you use speakerphone during conversations, you need to be shot in the foot.
If you’re on hold, fine: turn the volume down and do your thing while you wait. That’s the only time you should ever use speakerphone.
If you’re on speakerphone with me, I can’t hear a word you’re saying. If you’re on speakerphone with someone else, I can hear every mind-bending utterance. Both times I want to punch you in the kidney.
So, spare me the aneurysm and yourself the unecessary harm: don’t abuse your damn speakerphone.
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In Connecticut, a man was denied a job for being ‘too smart’.
Mr Jordan launched a federal lawsuit against the city, but lost.
The 2nd U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in New York upheld a lower court’s decision that the city did not discriminate against Mr Jordan because the same standards were applied to everyone who took the test.
Keep that in mind, folks. So long as you discriminate equally, you’re okay.
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If every software company had their way, this is what your browser would look like:
Fuck you software companies. Nobody likes toolbars. Nobody.
Don’t try to sneak them into our computers, bundling them with your main software, hiding them in “advanced options” boxes, checked by default.
Fuck you.
If I wanted a toolbar, you know what I’d do? I’d download one.
For every software company that I find doing this, I’m going to send them a cake. With a bomb inside. By default.
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IE7 was released in January of 2006, and yet 55% of IE users are still using version 6. This is despite ie6’s horrid, and I mean horrid standards support, and the fact that it’s seven years old and just outright incompetent overall.
“But Brian, Why upgrade? All your sites still look fine in ie6.” Yeah, because I spent painstaking hours making it that way.
The worst part is the vicious cyclicality of it all. Site owners don’t care about standards; they just want it to work. They pay the developer’s bills, so we’re forced to make a site work in a browser when, well… it shouldn’t. Through our own blood, sweat and tears we developers perpetuate the viability of the unviable, because, what incentive does a surfer have to upgrade to ie7 or Firefox when all the sites still work fine in 6?
At what point does support cease for this incompliant and out-of-date browser? At what point do we break the cycle? Soon, I hope.
You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one:
If you’re viewing this in ie6, shame on you. Get Firefox, or at the very least, update to IE7. You’ll thank me later.
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The Killer Turtle!!
Cute Turtle!
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Brian and I for the first time last night decided to take everyone’s advice and watch “Lost”. I rented the first season for us to watch, we got through the first four episodes last night. I think we are hooked!
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http://jubed.com/jokes/view/Motivators
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While building a site it was requested that I add the text, “Click the underlined text to view additional images”.
Now I know the elderly are all dribbling retards incapable of learning or common sense, but isn’t the fact they’re at the site proof enough of their ability to use a link? Apparently not.
So, fearing this explanation might still be too simple for our simple minded audience, I took the liberty of expanding upon it:
Use the peripheral attached to your computer that many refer to as a ‘mouse’. By ‘use’ we mean move the ‘mouse’ around to cause the cursor on the page to move respectively. Once you have ‘used’ the ‘mouse’, to ‘point’ to the underlined text, referred to as a ‘link’, you can then click the left button (assuming pc usage), in order to activate the ‘link’ and bring up the new content to which the link does link.
Thank goodness for youth’s kindness and consideration towards the ineptness of the elderly.
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